i miss u

Good morning everyone... i am just feeling so terrible today... i dunno why.. is it cos its a public holiday?? i miss her... i am missing her like crazy... today from 8am till now no misses from her... haiz.. back to work tomorrow and i really dunno how to get alomg with it... i am waiting to go to ubin with her and spend that special time with her though... i need her to be by my side.. this coming thursday marks our 1 week breaking up... but hmmm i feel that our love is growing stronger... is that meant to be?? i dunno...

Baby baby... i miss u deeply and i wanna spend my time with u till you grow old... are u willingly to be part of me?? i nee dyou baby....

Cameron for her birthday next year!!

Spoke to dad that I really want to go China with her next week. He went like nope cos we have been to too many places this year. But he promised that he sponsor us to hk next year. Told the good news to her and yeah. I told her can we have a short trip to celebrate her birthday too. And shE suggested Cameron. Nce. Ok ON to Cameron for her birthday!!! Am xcited cos I know the ubin trip will be our last trip together for this year!!! Haiz Baby baby what ever it is, I really miss u. Hugs...

i just downloaded calorie counter on my iphone.. it defin helps me keep track on what is left to eat for the day and the amount... anyway with my current weight.. i only can have 1800calories aday...

Edted at 12pm..

Breakfast- chicken cheese balls from old chang kee-545

Lunch- fish soup- 350

bubble tea- 100

Dinner-porridge-358

chicken nugget(3)-150

exercised- 239

"The Little Ones" deal is gone... she say give it up ba and we try something else.... she say her parents say i am not a business woman... haiz.. i guessed to her i a, a hopeless person... i think soo... i dunno...

Edited at 10.55pm

she will be gg to China soon... i dunno.. i am sure gonna miss her like crazy... i hop ei can pass the 8 days without seeing her though... and i hope our love will be stronger... sob sob sob..

baby baby.. i miss you... dunno whether u miss me too now.... haiz.. love u deeply

Today supposed to mark our 19th month

Today supposed to mark our 19th month.. but no.. i so much wanted to wish her happy 19th monthsary but i know i have to hold it back... cos we are no longer together.... i have this intention to just type out on my whatspp to her.. but i know i know its of no use.... so i guessed i will just type it here.. for myself to know.. Happy 19th monthsary my dear girl.... i love you from the bottom of my little sore heart........ hugs and kisses my love.... i love you... thank you fromm the bottom of my heart.....

Edited at 735am Good morning. The day is still young but I just can't get to sleep. Or should I say I did not sleep at all. my mind is her alone. just her. Today or should I say in 2 hrs time I'll be meeting her to go to ecp for some paddling session. Am so scared that my tears will just drop my cheeks. I dunno all I know is I miss her badly but what abt her????

Edited at 740pm...

i had a good time with the girl today.... met her at 1010am at my place the market with her parents.... then off to ecp.. went for out paddle boarding.. omg.. its fun but its tiring man.. really.. my arms are so tired now... after that.. went to shower... i honestly dunno what our staus is?? i actually apply her to "touch" me top and bottom.. omg... i held her... hugged her and cried.. for a while... dun even know whether she knew not... haoz.. after that went off.. supposed to walk to marine parad for icecream.. in the end too far and took a bus... and had bubble tea.. she had honey dew sago and i had passion fruit red tea... while supposed to walk to marine parade.. my tummy didnt feel good... wanted to vomit... why is it so... is it cos i had too much to eat or what... took a bus to orchard, went straight to the toilet.. and yeah.. all my breakfast came out... came out and supposed to have thai food.. but lady said cant cos the next day is ph.. so off to chinatown to have chicken rice.... the moment the food came... my tummy went funny again... went to the disgusting toilet and out came my bubble tea... wahahah... i had 1/4 of my lunch and yeah... went toilet to pee.... wanted to puke but cant... off we went to chinatown so she can pay for the remaining amount of the trip.... she is gg china on the 14th and yeah.. i have decided to go with her... but when she asked the agent.. they said its closed liao... haiz..i missed the chance.. lets see how tmr ba...

baby.. thanks for the day today... all i can say is i miss you....

intake

Breakfast: chwee kueh, carrot cake, grass jelly and beancurd 500 (out)

lunch: chicken rice, bean sprouts, bubble tea and lime juice-700 (out)

dinner: bubble tea, mango sorbet- 250

Our future

Good morning!!! Didn't hv a good sleep! Waited fir dad to come home only at 130am and we chatted till 3am. Yes the school deal is finally off!!! He told me this " girl, tell Jas the school deal ia off and u both can go and start something from scratch if u both wants too". The both of u wanted this school, but since u made a decision to call off, I've done it for u. What happened between the two of u I am not sure. Now the deal is off, have a good talk with her"!!! I think dad knows that I quarreled with her and yeah!!!he came back upset and just went on talking. I applied the school for the both of u under his name. Now it's over. Go n find something else to do which can hold u both strong together.  Dad went " rem, I am always here for the both of u". Ok I know I've broken his heart. I know I've broken her heart. But I guessed if this centrer actually brought ao much unhappiness, forget it. She chose not to believe me. And I chose to give it up. Whatever it is, hope we can find something n build it ip again. I swear I I will start diet today. Update soon. Girl I miss you I know from her messages everything is over!!! Are we able to get back?? I dunno but I truely missed her and missing her as my tears begin to roll down. I am having a terrible mood since yesterday. I know I can choose to stop it but humans are humans. I have feelings too. I dunno. I need her and I really do...

Today's diet:

Morning: orange juice-50

Lunch: soup and rice -100

Dinner-honey drink and bee hoon soup- 200

edited at 735pm

I am home and yes all i want is to hug u really badly.... since yesterday... i feel so empty... when i woke up this mronign... everything seems so dark.... my dear... cam we start all over again? u mentioned abt the school from scratch.. can we start a school from scratch... using our name.. just us.. solely us?? i really want to big our little future with you... the school that we bring out will be our future... and it will be all "The Little Ones".  i just can say I REALLY MISS YOU MY DEAR.. i do... can we just start all over again with our great future ahead of us.... and maybe get married overseas.... just the two of us... our school... holidays.. plus house....

Diet starts all over again??

Totally forgotten abt this blog till she mentioned it to me just now and i managed to get back to this.... its more than a year that i last blooged... enjoyed my happy times the and now i am gg through a rough time of having no one else by my side... yes... its over... we are both gg through a cooling down period.. will we be able to get through this?? i dunno.. if we are meant to be after the cooling down period.. good.... if not we will jsut be best of bestie buddies for life....

should i put me weight to a test in this relationship which i really want to salavge?? is that what GOD wants me to do?? if it is.. i will for the her.. for us.... cos.. love her too much to let it go... 10 hrs of crying is crazy today but i guessed its worth it... its her that i loved and loving.. welll i shall put my weight a test and lose that 5 kg first.... no lataxtives, no self-induced but just dieting and see how it goes...

My dear girl.... call me stupid.. but its a test for me... for this salavge... i really want u and build a little future with you....

Todays diet...

Orange Juice - 50

honey lemon juice -80

small bowl of soup-100??

lemon tea-100?

Girl... i m iss you and i really do.........